Over the last month, I have been reflecting on the end of the Gospel of Luke at my adoration hour. Specifically on Peter’s denial and Jesus meeting the disciples on the road to Emmaus. I feel called to share what I have heard. I will start with a reflection on Peter’s denial before jumping to the road to Emmaus with a later post.
First, a little context as the end of Luke’s gospel is action packed! Right after the Last Supper and institution of the Eucharist, “A dispute also arose among them, which of them was to be regarded as the greatest” (Lk 22:24). I sometimes find myself in this same train of thought. Its only natural for me to do so right? After all, this country is built on an ideal that if you’re not first, you’re last. Jesus answers, “let the greatest among you become as the youngest, and the leader as one who serves” (22:26). Come again Jesus? Isn’t this backwards? Could you imagine the apostles reaction? Jesus continues, “You are those who have continued with me in my trials; as my Father appointed a kingdom for me, so do I appoint for you that you may eat and drink at my table in my kingdom and sit on thrones judging the twelve tribes of Israel.” Jesus, the Son of God, has appointed me to eat and drink at His table, to be served by Him. “Lord, I am not worthy that you should enter under my roof, but only say the word and my soul shall be healed.” This is a prayer that Catholics pray before receiving the Eucharist.
My heart gets hung on “Lord I am not worthy” because I don’t feel worthy of such an invitation. The Son of God is calling me to His table!? My soul needs healing first, I need a nicer suit, a haircut, something because this is a BIG deal. This is a constant struggle of mine and can ultimately be attributed to the world we live in. Our world is broken, it is fallen. I’m not saying there is no beauty in it, because it is filled with beauty, but it is also fallen. Watch the nightly news, then go hike a mountain; you’ll see what I mean. This brings doubt and despair to me regarding my faith. I’m alone, I am here just to make money and be happy. I choose to do what is not best for me. I choose to do what is bad with respect to my faith! I choose what is wrong, I choose to sin. It seems like all I can do is wait for things to mess up! A voice says, “just don’t try, you know its hard work.” I go against the invitation from the Son of God. I sin repeatedly. I fall, over and over again like a baby learning to walk. But why oh God would you allow me to struggle with these things? Please keep these struggles away from my family. How could I turn down such a grand invitation?? Because I want to protect myself??? I want to serve myself??? I want to serve myself. The voice says again, “asking others for help will bring judgement and a lessening of my reputation. Keep these things to yourself if you want to be first.” For some reason, things don’t turn out the way I expect or the way I want. Why Lord?
Jesus says, “Simon (insert your name), Simon, behold, Satan demanded to have you, that he might sift you like wheat, but I have prayed for you that your faith may not fail; and when you have turned again, strengthen your brethren” (22:31,32).
Turn again? In principle, how stupid could I be to turn down happiness? Peter says, “Lord I am ready to go with you to prison and to death,” knowing that what Jesus offers is the happiness he desires. Peter is wiling, I am willing, but Jesus answers, “I tell you Peter, the cock will not crow this day, until you three times deny that you know me.”
As things go south for Jesus, his followers scatter, they run from the good, they choose what is wrong, to run from Jesus. Peter indeed denies Jesus three times “and he went out and wept bitterly” (22:62). The truth I think about as I read these pages is, every decision we make does indeed matter. There is a right and there is a wrong. The wrong choices lead us down a spiraling road to despair, laziness and anxiety about the future. Especially in recent times; putting our trust in the world, in our plans will only lead to anxiety about the future. However, living by faith puts a focus on the present moment, which in turn helps to plan/guide your future. I know this path leads to life/happiness/peace. I speak from experience. Jesus has prayed for our faith, that it might not fail. Jesus is pro faith, but what happens to me when I choose what is wrong? In the following chapter, we see what Jesus does for Peter, what he does for me. He endures a horrendous death, the death that I should deserve and then He defeats death itself. The consequences of Peter’s wrong doing, of my wrong doing, are taken away assuming that we “turn again” (32). Remember Jesus’ words, “Simon (insert your name), Simon, behold, Satan demanded to have you, that he might sift you like wheat, but I have prayed for you that your faith may not fail; and when you have turned (Epistrepho) again, strengthen your brethren” (22:31,32). The road will be rough at times, we might fail, our plans fail, but our faith never fails. Even in our shortcomings, all we have to do is turn around. Give the song below a listen before reading on.
Fun fact, the original Greek word used here for “turn” is “Epistrepho.” This word appears more in the book of Acts than anywhere else in the Bible. The book of Acts is essentially the testimony of the apostles and their work. So the power of this passage is strong. While we may fail like Peter’s denial, Jesus prays that our faith will never fail, that we will always turn to Him. Doing this will strengthen our friends in faith, which has gone on to make the Catholic Church a billion people strong. Its not about me. Its about serving others, loving others, a sort of collective. This is the good news, “for God so loved the world that he gave his only-begotten Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life” (John 3:16). You don’t have to take the broken road, there is a free invitation to a never ending wedding reception. Who doesn’t love free stuff? We will fail along the way, but turn again, ALWAYS TURN and God will be there as faith in God never fails. Perfect faith means to always turn, constantly turn. Then, you serve. Strengthen others around you as faith is meant to be shared because its not even ours to possess. Its a total gift from God. Lead by example, be happy, live like no one is watching. This gives me peace and joy in what is seemingly the day-to-day grind. In reality, its an invitation to a greater life, an eternal one. God bless you, Holy Spirit guide you, Jesus pray that our faith may never fail.
A Patient Scientist 